i just told you how i felt and that i was crying and u can’t be by your phone to respond to me… your killing me.
im so tired inside. so hurt. and i miss lucas more than anything.
can i tell you how good i just made myself feel. very good orgasm. aha i feel good and relieved
i just wrote all that… and now im just annoyed. where’s my baby? why is this so hard… why arent u eager to talk to me and be with me like you used to be… i dont understand.. like if ur online and im online we’d always be talking.. now we never talk.. things are so different.. and i feel so sad. so lost. empty. i should be strong and independent on my own but if things were just ok… fuck im sick to my stomach
If I could, I’d wrap you up in my arms or maybe I’d curl up into yours and I’d just let you know how much I really do love you. Thinking about you gives me the jitters/butterflies but also makes me a hundred percent calm. It makes me excited and overwhelmed and content.. Thinking about us makes me feel disbelief, awe, perfect, scared, curious, and just way to comfortable and way to overly happy. If I could I’d run my hands through your perfect shade of dark hair and I’d look into your intriguing mysterious beautiful hazel eyes and I’d kiss your entire face. I’d lift your shirt over your head and run my hands down your body, from my chocolate chips to my other favorite man. I’d take off my shirt and pull you against me so I could feel your warmth soak into me. I would take your hands and intertwine them with mine and I’d tell you I’m never going to let go. That you’ll always be the only one to hold and love me for the rest of my life. I’d tell you to never forget the love you have for me and to always fight for it.. because I will always do the same for you and I will always stand by your side. You’re my baby, my man, my rock, my everything.. and I’m not willing to lose you.